Union Songs
Has-Been Hazards
A song by Phyl Lobl©Phyl Lobl 2010
Tune One of the Has-BeensI'm one of the has-beens, a Prime Minister ex,
I once used to advertise Ko-koda treks,
But I stayed far too long on the political trail,
I was put out to pasture by an up-start female.Now I've been overlooked by the cricketing mob. (Aughh ughugh)
No that's not a cough, it's a strangulated sob.
The game that they served me it just wasn't fair,
You could not call it cricket but they didn't care.*NOW there is a new chum in line for the Lodge,
But that straw-berry blonde has ex-PM's to dodge.
(Repeat last line with Audience participation as chorus)I'm a has-been as well, or so the press say,
But my name is still fore-front by the hand of D'Alpuget
My silvery mane it still covers my head,
I do not wear budgies, just called one instead.*PAST PM's are not helping the sheila it seems,
They are too busy trying to mend broken dreams.
(Audience repeats last line )I'm another of the has-beens, I freed up the banks
I was all for getting rid of the Brits but not Yanks,
At least I have a musical, & though it's not the top job,
I still like to spar with a Budgie called Bob.*NOW THIS stella, sheila new chum, some thought she was Red
But that Copper-top, that Ranga, looks blue now instead.
(Audience repeats last line)I was not a PM, just up for the job,
I was feisty I was frantic to strike (with) a left lob.
But one blow too many and Howard won through,
I wish I had dyed my hair now, and called myself Blue.*YES THAT Redhead is striking her light very well,
She a match for Tony Abbott the chief lib-er-al
(Audience repeats last line)I'm Kevin from Queensland an ex-PM too,
My end it came suddenly, a bolt from ?The Blue',
My life was up-turned I did not see the trend,
Unlike Mist-er Beckham I never learnt to bend.God, if it was you who decided the coup
I don't understand ?cos she doesn't talk to you,
All those Sundays in church had me feeling secure,
Now I'm here in the wilderness, lost and unsure.*BUT, she's a Redhead, a Coppertop, a Ranga, a Blue,
With a rival like that let's hope Abbott's gone too.
(Audience repeats last line )
Notes
Many thanks to Phyl Lobl for permision to add this song to the Union Songs collection.
Phyl writes:
'July 17 - 2010 Australian Federal Election announced. A Parody for the times. The tune is available in numerous Folksong books or recordings.
TUNE : ?Polly Perkins'/?Cushy Butterfield' / 'One of the Has-beens'Find more of Phyl's work in this collection
Visit Phyl's website at http://phyllobl.net/
union songs..........a selection by mark gregory